My rent ain't paid but I'm alive y'all that's okay
I had my Ipod on shuffle, heard one of my lines
I said I'm like Gotti, Ghandi and god all combined damn
I be spittin' some flames, How y'all doin? It's a beautiful day
I used to complain about my financial state, career shit
My girl trouble, now I don't hear shit
Peep this story, I went to work just to clear my desk
And say goodbye to all the folks I left
Then I seen my man, who always showed up to work with a smile
We would kick it at lunchtime and I admired his style
He was excited everyday, he was the first one there
And we would always roll together though he rolled in a chair with wheels
'Cause he ain't walk in like about 3 years
He said the accident had happened when he had a few beers
Arguing with his wife, he never told me the story
Until the day I looked defeated and he said that's when I needed it
I asked him why he's always happy as Hell
He said he's happy as Heaven with a story to tell
He said: "Me and my girl was fightin' maybe she suspected cheatin'
'Cause I was, I was buzzed and there's times I almost beat her
But I didn't, we was newlyweds, tight from junior high
I was raised in Crown Heights, she grew up in Do or die
And the night we was beefing, dog I ain't gon' even lie
I said I hate u she said 'why don't you die? '
I didn't mean it, but she checked my phone
I was driving on the road, she like 'who the hell is this? '
How am I supposed to know?
'It's that bitch you be with, nigga call her right now'
I'm like chill girl calm the fuck down
Put your seat belt on, tears in her eyes 'how can you be so wrong?
You still fucking her? ' I'm like nah, not really
She swinging, I'm laughing, til she caught me in the eye
I couldn't see, tried to switch lanes fast I said I tried
'Cause the next thing I know, I saw clouds in the sky
I was laying on my back there was cars passing by
Heard the sirens, noise, wilding I was doing more than 60
Some people say God was with me
I say he's always there, even though my girl looked so scared
She started shaking on the stretcher then the next 90 seconds
I was in the hospital, with the doc giving blessings
Said my legs stopped working and my lady she was pregnant
And we mighta saved the baby, what baby? I was stressing like
Save my lady we'll make another baby!
But we never got the chance
Never said I love you all I got was a glance
Life can't be this bad, yes it can!
I was thinking at first
She passed and it couldn't be worse
I went into trauma, my mama came
Some nights inside my brain I dream I could've saved her but the dream just fades
They tell me I'm a walk one day, and I can feel it
2 weeks ago, my right knee cap got back the feeling
And my ankle started twitching dog this is not a game
That's why I laugh when y'all be crying and complaining
And I ain't saying you sound stupid
But that day I met the boss
You told me keep my fingers crossed and you knew I couldn't do it
You beef about blocks you be trooping
Life is hard but I ain't making excuses
I just pray, I don't cry, I don't ask God why
I watched my wife die, but He kept me alive and now
I can still see her smile as I stare in my daughter's eyes
And say thanks for my child yo everyday is a good day."
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